On my tombstone please write “Not appreciating my puns when I was alive was a grave mistake”
when none of ur internet friends are online
a woman has twins and gives them up for adoption
one of them goes to a family in egypt and is named amal the other goes to a family in spain they name him juan
years later juan sends a picture of himself to his birth mother. upon receiving the picture she tells her husband that she wishes she also had a picture of amal
he responds “theyre twins if youve seen juan youve seen amal”
"Abomination? Abomelettenation - geddit?”
"That’s bad, love. Even by my standards. And my standards for puns aren’t high.”
or: the story of how Hawke was banned from the kitchen (and egg-related puns) forever.
Don’t listen to Anders, the pun is beautiful.
Oh my gods.
Waldo from the Where’s Waldo books
He wears stripes
because he doesn’t want to be spotted.
i’m gonna hit something.
I don’t know if it’s been done yet
Best use of the meme hands down.
*sexually strokes wall until finding light switch*
What a turn on.
funerals are so depressing. i want a parade when i die. cupcakes. airhorns. dancing. maybe even a murder mystery game with me as the person who was murdered.
you want to put the fun back in funeral
there are over 500 types of pasta. Wow. the pastabilities are endless
“Pew pew pew” -church interior designer
"Garrus is stranded on an island. He falls in love with a palm tree."
WTF KINK MEME.